Here’s How to Talk With Parents Who Need More Care But Don’t Want to Admit It

It may happen when you visit parents over a holiday—or it could be something you notice gradually over a few visits. Your mom or dad may be having trouble paying bills or organizing a budget. Or, they’re struggling to get everyday tasks done around the house due to mobility challenges.

You want to have that talk with them to suggest that they need additional care, such as a trusted professional who can help monitor their financial tasks or a health aide who can take on additional chores around the house. However, you know how independent your parents are and that they’ll likely be resistant to the idea.

You’re not alone in your dilemma. Many adult children go through this scenario and hesitate to speak up. However, the downside of that is there could be a higher risk for financial consequences (such as mounting debt or accounts going to collections). Or, there could be an increased risk for an injury if mom or dad are trying to do tasks they can no longer do. Here are a few tips to help bridge that discussion of needing additional help:

  • Do some research. Before having that talk with the parents, have some ideas in mind. Can your family afford to hire a caregiver to come to the home a couple of times a week? Which local business will you use for that? Having concrete ideas in mind of what is realistic and affordable could take some of the fear of the unknown out of the equation.
  • Talk in advance if possible. Try to broach the topic when your parents are still in good health. This could potentially avoid some emotion or drama down the line.
  • Acknowledge their feelings. If you are having the talk about needing additional care and you’re met with resistance, ask why, but do so in a kind, diplomatic way. Recognize and acknowledge that needing additional help may be hard for them. 
  • Go slow. If the need for additional help or care is still small, suggest a baby step to help out. Perhaps a caregiver just one afternoon a week is enough. Or, maybe your parents just need someone to help organize their mail and remove any junk mail or solicitations for money. Once they see that small step is successful they may be more willing to something else in the future.

If you’re still struggling with how to talk to your parents about needing additional care management, give Secure Aging a call. We guide clients through this challenge every day, and we’re ready to help.

Call Secure Aging to Find Out How We Can Help Seniors With Care Management

At Secure Aging in Bradenton, we transform the weight of the world into a sigh of relief for our senior clients and their concerned family members. The mission of Secure Aging is to protect and preserve our client’s independence and dignity through careful and thoughtful financial and care management. As our clients’ age, it is their desire to remain independent and age with dignity. Our services protect our clients from talented con artists looking to exploit and deplete the financial resources of our vulnerable seniors. Secure Aging helps families in Manatee County and Sarasota County and in and around the communities of Anna Maria, Bradenton, Bradenton Beach, Ellenton, Holmes Beach, Lakewood Ranch, Longboat Key, Myakka City, Palmetto, Parrish, and Sarasota. Call us at 941-761-9338, or visit us online at

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