How to Get Involved With Your Parents’ Care Decisions…Even If They Say They Don’t Need Your Help

Does this sound familiar? You notice that your parents’ health is waning. You offer to help monitor their bills and mail and take them to doctors’ appointments, but they insist that they don’t need your help. Meanwhile, you worry about their ability to drive, missed bills, or opportunistic scams that could take advantage of their good nature.

It’s only human to want to stay independent as long as possible, but there also comes a time when many of us will need help from others to help manage our daily tasks. Helping your parents with their care may sound easy in theory but hard in practice. They resist because they want to remain independent or they may not like the idea of you filling in that parental role. Here are a few suggestions to help make this transition a little easier.

  1. Bring up the topic early if possible. If your parents are older but still in good health, try to broach the topic of how you (and perhaps others in your family) can help them with their care when it may be needed in the future. Find out what care preferences they have. Do your best to stay neutral and factual during this talk. If you have siblings, make it a family discussion.
  2. Don’t talk down to them. Taking on a more parental role, it could feel natural to talk to your parents as if they are children….but they are not. Keep an even, neutral tone as best as you can. If any discussion is getting heated, agree to let cooler heads prevail and revisit the topic when everyone can talk more neutrally.
  3. Introduce or identify a home caregiver before the need is there. If your concern is certain tasks around the home that are no longer getting done as they should, then perhaps your parents need a caregiver who comes to the home weekly or daily. Identifying a home caregiver in advance who could be a good match for your parents can save time and stress down the line. Your parents may need time to warm to the idea but may come around to it if they like the caregiver.
  4. Consider using a neutral party to help with financial and care management. Although you and your siblings or adult children can potentially handle financial and care management yourself for your parents, this can create added headaches. It also can put you in a different role with your parents that they (or you) may not feel comfortable with. Secure Aging can take on the role of financial and care management so you can continue your relationship with your parents without the extra hassle. Call us today at 941-761-9338, or visit our website for more information. 


Call Secure Aging to Find Out How We Can Help Seniors With Care Management

At Secure Aging in Bradenton, we transform the weight of the world into a sigh of relief for our senior clients and their concerned family members. The mission of Secure Aging is to protect and preserve our client’s independence and dignity through careful and thoughtful financial and care management. As our clients age, it is their desire to remain independent and age with dignity. Our services protect our clients from talented con artists looking to exploit and deplete the financial resources of our vulnerable seniors. Secure Aging helps families in Manatee County and Sarasota County and in and around the communities of Anna Maria, Bradenton, Bradenton Beach, Ellenton, Holmes Beach, Lakewood Ranch, Longboat Key, Myakka City, Palmetto, Parrish, and Sarasota. Call us at 941-761-9338, or visit us online at

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